Self-Observation

“Live from instant to instant, from moment to moment, without the painful weight of the past, without worrying about the future. Relax the mind. Empty it of all thoughts, desires, passions, etc. Surrender to your profound interior God; completely forget all worldliness.”  - Samael Aun Weor

The Observer and The Observed

It is very clear and not difficult to comprehend that when one seriously begins to observe oneself from the point of view that the “myself” is not “one” but “many,” one then really begins to work on all that is carried within.

Some obstacles, stumbling blocks for the work of intimate self observation, such are the following psychological defects:
Megalomania (delusions of grandeur, to believe that one is a God).
Self-worship (belief in a permanent “I” adoration of any type of alter-ego).
Paranoia (know-it all ignoramus, self-sufficiency, vanity, thinking oneself infallible, mystic pride, person who does not like to see another person”s point of view).

When an individual continues with the absurd conviction that myself is “one,” such a person possesses a permanent “I” Then, the serious work upon oneself becomes more than impossible. Whosoever always considers himself as “one” will never be able to separate the Self from his own undesirable elements.

Whosoever accepts the Doctrine of the Many “I” based on self-observation, comprehends that every desire, thought, action, passion, etc., corresponds to this or that “I” meaning, to a distinct or different “I” Whosoever works very seriously on himself, as any athlete of inner Self-Observation, exerts upon himself the effort to separate from his psyche the diverse undesirable elements which he carries within... Thus, if one truly and very sincerely begins to observe oneself internally, one ends up dividing himself in two: the Observer and the Observed.

when this division does not occur, we then continue identified with all the processes of the pluralized “I” Whosoever identifies himself with the diverse processes of the pluralized “I” is always a victim of circumstances.

How could the one who does not know himself modify circumstances? How could a person who has never observed himself internally know himself? In what way can someone observe himself if this one, first of all, does not divide himself into Observer and Observed?

Now then, no one can start to change radically as long as such a one is incapable of saying: “This desire is an animal “I” which I must eliminate.” “This egotistical thought is another “I” that torments me and that I need to disintegrate.” “This sentiment that hurts
my heart is an intruding “I,” which I need to reduce to cosmic dust.” etc. Naturally, the statements of the former paragraph are impossible to say for the one who has never divided himself between Observer and Observed. Diverse thoughts surge from the intellectual center, not from a permanent “I” as the learned ignoramuses foolishly assume, but from the different “I’s” in each of us.
When a person is thinking, he firmly believes that he is the one who is thinking in himself and by himself. The wretched intellectual mammal does not want to realize that the multiple thoughts that cross his mind have their origin in the different “I’s” which we carry within.

However, each of the different “I’s” that we carry within utilizes our intellectual center. At any time, as often as possible, each of them utilizes the intellectual center in order to think. Therefore, to identify ourselves with this or that negative and harmful thought, believing it to be our particular property, would be an absurdity. Obviously, this or that negative thought proceeds from any “I” which in a given moment has abusively used our intellectual center. Different types of negative thoughts exist, namely: suspicion, distrust, ill-will towards another person, passionate jealousy, religious jealousy, political jealousy, family or friendship jealousy, covetousness, lust, revenge, anger, pride, envy, hatred, resentment, theft, adultery, laziness, gluttony, etc. Indeed, we could not succeed in enumerating all the psychological defects we have since they are too many, not even if we had a steel palate and a thousand tongues to speak. Therefore, and as a corollary to the former statement, to identify us with negative thoughts is an absurdity.

The relation between thinker and thought is obvious. Each negative thought has its origin in a different thinker.
Many negative thinkers exist within each one of us, as many thoughts of the same class.

Examining this subject matter from the pluralized angle of “thinkers and thoughts,” it is understood then that each one of the “I’s” that we carry in our psyche is certainly a different thinker. Unquestionably, too many thinkers exist inside each one of us. Nonetheless, each one of these inner-thinkers, in spite of being merely one part, believes himself to be the whole, at any given moment...

Those quarrelsome and negative “I’s” easily take control of certain mental films that are stored in our intellectual center, which sequentially originate harmful and noxious mental currents. If we accept those thoughts, those negative “I’s,” which at any given moment control our intellectual center, we shall then be incapable of freeing ourselves from their influence.
We must never forget that every negative “I” deceives itself and betrays to that end; it lies.
The negative “I” of jealousy deceives those beings who adore each other and destroys their happiness.
The negative “I” of mystical pride deceives the devotees of the Path. Thus, believing themselves to be wise, they despise their Master and betray Him... The negative “I” appeals to our personal experiences, our memories, our best wishes, our
sincerity. Hence, amidst all of these things, through a rigorous selection, this negative “I” presents something under a false light, something that fascinates. Thus, the outcome is failure... Nonetheless, when one discovers that “I” in action, when one has learned to live in a state of alertness, then, such a deception becomes impossible.

To change is the best; however, we must begin by being sincere with ourselves. We need to make a psychological inventory of ourselves in order to know what we have in excess or what we lack.
It is clear that only through inner self-observation shall we be able to see the people who live in our psyche and who we need to eliminate in order to achieve a radical transformation.

Any internal change demands the previous elimination of the “I’s” that we carry within We cannot by any means, eliminate such Is if we do not internally observe them Those who consider themselves “one” those who think the best of themselves, those who would never accept the Doctrine of the Many will never desire to observe their “I’s” Therefore, within them, any possibility of change will be impossible.

We need to “de-egotize” ourselves so we can “individualize” ourselves

Sacred individuality is very far beyond any type of “I” Sacred individuality is what it is what it has always been and what it shall always be Legitimate individuality is the Being The reason for the Being to be is to be the Being Himself Distinguish between the Being and the I Those Who confuse the “I” with the Being have certainly never observed themselves seriously.
-Revolutionary Psychology, Samael Aun Weor


Observation of Oneself

Internal self-observation is a practical means to achieve a radical transformation. To know and to observe are different. Many confuse the observation of oneself with knowing. For example, even though we know that we are seated in a living room, this,
however, does not signify that we are observing the chair.

We know that at a given moment we are in a negative state, perhaps with a problem, worried about this or that matter, or in a state of distress or uncertainty, etc. This, however, does not mean that we are observing the negative state. Do you feel antipathy towards someone? Do you dislike a certain person? Why? You may say that you know that person... Please observe that person; to know is not the same as to observe! Do not confuse knowing with observing...

The observation of oneself, which is one hundred percent active, is a way to change oneself. However, knowing, which is passive, is not a way to change oneself. Indeed, knowing is not an act of attention. Yet, the attention directed into oneself, towards what is happening in our interior, is something positive, active... For instance, we may feel antipathy towards a person, just because we feel like it and many times for no particular reason. If we observe ourselves in such a moment we will notice the multitude of thoughts that accumulate in our mind. We will also notice the group of voices that speak and scream in a disorderly manner and that say many things within our mind, as well as the unpleasant emotions that surge in our interior and the unpleasant taste that all this leaves in our psyche, etc. Obviously, in such a state we also realize that internally we are badly mistreating the person for whom we feel antipathy towards. But, unquestionably, in order to see all of this, we need attention intentionally directed towards the interior of our own selves.This is not a passive attention.

Indeed, dynamic attention proceeds from the side of the observer, while thoughts and emotions belong to the side, which is observed. All of this causes us to comprehend that knowing is something completely passive and mechanical, in evident contrast with the observation of the self which is a conscious act. Nevertheless, we are not affirming that mechanical self- observation does not exist; it does, but such a kind of observation has nothing to do with the psychological self observation to which we are referring. To think and to observe are also very different. Any person can give himself the luxury of thinking about himself all he wants; yet, this does not signify that he is truly observing himself. We need to see the different “I’s” in action, to discover them in our psyche, to comprehend that a percentage of our own consciousness exists within each one of them, to repent of having created them, etc. Then we shall exclaim: “But what is this “I” doing?” “‘ Is it saying?” “What does it want?” “Why does it torment me with its lust, with its anger?” etc. Then we will see within ourselves the entire train of thoughts, emotions, desires, passions, private comedies, personal dramas, elaborated lies, discourses, excuses, morbidities, beds of pleasure, scenes of lasciviousness, etc. Many times before falling asleep, at the precise instant of transition between vigil and sleep, we feel within our own mind different voices that talk to each other. Those are the different “I’s” that must in such moments break all connection with the different centers of our organic machine, so as to then submerge themselves in the molecular world within
the Fifth Dimension.
-Revolutionary Psychology, Samael Aun Weor

The "I" exercises control over the five inferior centers of the human machine. [...] Whosoever wants to dissolve the "I" must study its functionalism within the five inferior centers. We must not condemn the defects; we must not justify them either. What is important is to comprehend them. It is urgent to comprehend the actions and reactions of the human machine. Each one of these five inferior centers has a whole set of extremely complicated actions and reactions. The "I" works with each one of these five inferior centers. Therefore, by deeply comprehending the whole mechanism of each one of these centers, we are on our way to dissolving the "I."
- Samael Aun Weor, The Perfect Matrimony

 

Self-Observation and Meditation

We have been talking about some of the preliminary steps that are required for any meditator. These steps start out first and foremost and foundational with the development of powerful attention. We have to learn to control our attention, how we pay attention. In Gnosis we call this Self-observation and Self-remembering.

Any individual who is trying to learn how to meditate but is not learning how to Self-observe at all times of the day and night will spend years being frustrated. Meditation is only deeper Self-observation. That is really all it is. It is deeper, it is more profound, it is more focused.

Without Self-observation there can be no Meditation. There can only be fantasy, and fantasy is the opposite of Meditation.

We meditate to understand the mind. Meditation is not a technique to have mystical experiences. You may have them, and if you persist then you definitely will. But it is not the point. Meditation is not about spacing out, it is about the opposite of that. It is about becoming extraordinarily perceptive. It is not about fantasizing; it is the opposite. It is not about getting high, or having ecstatic experiences. That may happen; but it is not the point. And Meditation can become another part of the cage of our mind if we stimulate our desire for experiences. Many become stuck there.

The real purpose of Meditation is to gather information about ourselves, to comprehend why we suffer and how we can change that. This is why we meditate. It has nothing to do with what most people call "religion," it has nothing to do with culture, with being with one sect or another group, or another club, or having a name or having a certain outfit that you wear. It has to do very simply with becoming a good human being. That is it. We meditate to become a good person. That is the real reason, the real motivation. Any other motivation is desire, is a false concept and will become a trap.

Once these things are somewhat understood and we begin to work with the Consciousness, to learn how to change, to stop acting mechanically, to change our anger, to change our habits, to begin to sacrifice things that are really irrelevant in our lives, from that place we can really learn what Meditation is. We can begin to see the truth about the Consciousness. But, as we have said, this requires a lot of sincerity, tremendous courage, and honesty. It does not mean you have to go and expose all your problems to everyone. It means you have to be brave enough to face your self-created illusions, the way you delude yourself, the way you keep yourself in ignorance, to be ignorant; ignoring the truth about yourself, your mind, how you are, how you behave, what you do, what you wish for. You can no longer avoid things if you want to understand what Meditation is.

Meditation is about change. It is about changing ourselves to become better people. And if you do not have that intention then you are wasting your time here. There are millions of other schools that can help you get a lot of money if that is what you really want, or get a lot of power, or be popular, or be good looking or attractive. If you want those things, obviously there are places that can help you, but at a price. Everything costs something. Nothing escapes that law. Everything costs, nothing is free. You can have power, you can have money, you can have sexual attraction; but at what price? In the Gospels it says:

For what does a man profiteth if he gained the whole world but loses his soul?

There are many levels to the mind; it is quite deep. The goal of Meditation, the goal of the path, is to make the unconscious conscious, to make the subconscious conscious and to make the infraconscious into Consciousness. We must become fully conscious of all these aspects of ourselves and thus make that 3% into 100%.


Meditation itself is exactly the same as growing a plant. To grow a plant you need certain causes and conditions. Meditation is the same. As long as we have the right causes and conditions then the result that we want will arise naturally, very easily, exactly like planting a seed. You clear the weeds, you make sure you have sun, air and light, sunlight. You plant the seeds and you make sure it stays clear of invaders like bugs or birds. You give it a little water and you wait. Meditation is exactly the same.

So first we must define the causes and conditions, what is it that we need and what is it that we do not need. It is really unfortunate that so many meditators and even Meditation teachers will meditate for years and years and be missing one ingredient, usually something simple. And it will keep them from really understanding Meditation and going further. You can encounter this sad truth in many places you go to study. The different instructors and schools may have a lot, but if they are missing one thing, some little thing, it is enough to keep the plant from growing. One thing. You can plant a seed but if it will not get any sun it will not grow. Or you can plant a seed but if there are a lot of weeds there the seed is going to be choked. It is not going to survive. It is the same with Meditation.

So Self-observation, ethics, these are causes and conditions that are required to know how to meditate. They are inescapable and unavoidable. They must be applied.

Learning to be mindful 24 hours a day is not easy and one cannot do it halfway. Everything you have must to be focused on that. It has to become your obsession, the main thing that you worry about, that you focus on: "How do I pay attention? How do I not pay attention? Where do I lose my attention? When do I start thinking again, start dreaming again, start fantasizing, worrying? What makes me do that? How do I change it?"

This may sound kind of boring; but without this condition there can be no awakening.

What is it to awaken? It is to see what one did not see before. Can such a thing happen automatically? Absolutely not! Nothing happens without causes and conditions, thus we can understand why so few people are positively awakened: because they have not produced the causes in themselves. However, there are many, many people who are awakening negatively, because they have become completely absorbed by their own ego.

The universe exists because the causes and conditions came together in order to create it.

Likewise, our physical body exists because of causes and conditions.

Thus, we must awaken in the same way; it is not a matter of belief or faith: it a result of working to establish the proper combination of factors.

The awakened Consciousness is an experiential state of perception that does not arise randomly or merely by wishing for it.


Self-observation. It is how we observe ourselves. Without it there can be no awakening. There can only be ideas and there can only be suffering. It is essential that we understand how to observe ourselves.
-Gnostic  Teachings


Learn more read:
    -The Great Rebellion by Samael Aun Weor
    -The Revolution of the Dialectic by Samael Aun Weor
    -Treatise of Revolutionary Psychology by Samael Aun Weor